"Margaret." A voice called just as Daniel was about to open the backdoor that lead to the O'Reilly's backyard.
Margaret turned and impatiently asked, "What is it Frank?" She wasn't feeling well, the pains in her back were getting worse and she didn't feel like dealing with old Ferret Face right then. The only person she wanted was Hawkeye. She needed to feel his arms around her and to hear his voice comforting her. Unfortunately, Frank had other ideas.
He had been standing just out of earshot, watching them talking with Peg Hunnicutt, desperately trying to think of a way to get Margaret alone. He needed to talk to her, immediately. It was very important for both of their lives that he get a few minutes alone with her.
"Excuse me, sir." He said to the other gentleman, putting his hand on Margaret's elbow. "I'd like to speak with your daughter alone for a moment."
"Is that okay with you Margaret?" The older man asked, his arm still protectively around her. He was eyeing Frank cautiously.
Margaret sighed in exasperation and decided to get whatever Frank had in mind over with so she could go and be with Hawkeye. "Yeah, its okay, Dad. I'll be out in a minute." She hugged him tightly.
"Very well." He replied, kissing the side of head before he released her. He watched silently for a moment as Frank lead Margaret towards the French doors that lead into the living room. "I'll be just outside if you need me." He added before they disappeared into the room.
Margaret smiled warmly. "Thanks Dad. I'll be right out." Then with an annoyed sigh she let Frank usher her into the living room.
After he had shut the doors behind them, she turned and impatiently demanded. "What do you want, Frank?"
Frank stood, with his back to the closed doors and looked at her for a moment. He had a goofy grin on his face.
"What is it, Frank?" Margaret repeated, her annoyance rising with every moment he stood staring at her.
"Oh, Margaret." He simpered, then he suddenly sprang at her and tried to kiss her. "Oh, Margaret, I want you. You can't imagine how much I've missed you. Things haven't been the same since we broke up. I've been miserable."
"Get away from me, Frank!" She snarled angrily as she fought him off. "Keep your hands off me!"
"But, Margaret." He protested, trying to touch her again. "I can't, you're just so beautiful. I mean you've put on some weight, not that you're fat or anything, you're just not as thin as you were when we were in Korea. But don't worry, you'll always look beautiful in my eyes. We'll just have to watch what you eat until you get that girlish figure back again."
"Frank," Margaret sighed in exasperation. "I haven't gained weight because of what I've been eating. I've gained weight because I'm nine months pregnant."
"Pregnant?" Frank replied, surprise on his face. "What do you mean you're pregnant?"
"I mean that I'm going to have a baby, Frank." Margaret replied in annoyance. She had forgotten how truly dense he could be. "Surely you must remember that from Medical School. Even if you did forget everything else."
"But how can you be pregnant?" Frank asked in a whinny sounding voice.
"I don't know, Frank. It's a medical mystery." She replied sarcastically, looking at him in disbelief. "I'm a married woman, Frank. You figure it out." She tossed her head angrily and moved to get by him so she could leave, but he grabbed her shoulders. "Margaret, you can't tell me that you and that snotty Colonel Penobscott are happy together." Frank commented.
"Actually, Frank," Margaret replied, looking at him in annoyance. "I divorced Donald years ago."
"You did?" Frank giggled happily.
"Yes, I did." She nodded. "He turned out to be a no good cheater."
"Well, I could have told you that." He replied, then he tried to hug her again saying, "Then that means that we can pick up where we left off."
"No we can't Frank. Now get off me, Frank!" She exclaimed, pushing him away. "I may have divorced Donald, but as I told you, I'm married - happily married. My husband is the most wonderful man in the world. He's loving and caring and completely faithful. He adores me and I adore him. We have a wonderful life and a beautiful family, and I am not going to screw it up with the likes of you, so let me go!"
"Well, fine, if you don't need my love, then you at least need my protection." Frank stated firmly.
"Your protection? Your protection from what?" Margaret cried incredulously. "The only thing that I need protection from is you. Now leave me alone!"
"What about Pierce." Frank insisted, grabbing her arms tightly. "I saw the way he was grabbing you. He was all over you."
"You leave him alone, Frank." She warned, her anger rising. "Ben is none of your business."
"Ben? Who's Ben?" Frank asked, a puzzled look on his face. "I'm talking about Pierce."
"That's right, Frank. 'Ben'jamin Franklin Pierce." Margaret stated slowly saying the name. "He does have a name other than his last one."
"Margaret, why are you being so friendly to him?" Frank cried in disbelief. "I saw him attack you. He even scared that little midget person you were with."
"That 'little midget person' happens to be my daughter, Rebecca." Margaret replied glaring at him. "And you were the one who scared her when you made Ben drop me."
"Margaret, I don't know what kind of spell he's cast on you, but trust me, he's an animal. He can't be trusted." He tried to put his arms around her. "Please, let me protect you from him."
"Frank, I warn you." She cried, fighting him off. "Let me go!"
"Excuse me, Frank." A voice suddenly interrupted the struggling pair. Frank turned at the sound of the familiar voice and found Hawkeye standing in the doorway of the living room with the rest of the men behind him. "I don't mean to intrude, but I have a question I want to ask you." His tone was very calm and controlled, but Margaret could tell that he was very angry about what he had just witnessed. And she didn't blame him. She wouldn't have been too happy to walk in and find another woman tying to hit on her husband. But looking at her husband's face and the look in his eyes, she was almost afraid of what he was going to do to Frank.
"And what's that, Pierce?" Margaret's assailant was asking in a very snotty tone, while standing protectively in front of her.
"Oh, nothing much." Hawkeye shrugged his shoulders casually as he stepped towards the other man. "I was just noticing how concerned you were about protecting Margaret from me."
"Yeah, so." Frank exclaimed, his tone still full of disgust and revoltion.
"Well, I was just wondering who was going to protect you from me!" Before Frank could reply, Hawk had grabbed him by the collar and punched him directly between the eyes. Frank sputtered in surprise and fell backwards into a bookshelf.
"Pierce, what do you think you're doing?" Frank exclaimed in shock as he landed with a thump on the floor. "Are you crazy? I could have you charged with assault!"
Hawkeye took one step towards him, but Margaret grabbed his arm. She was afraid that he was going to do something that he might later regret. "Ben, he's not worth it." She told him.
"Margaret!" Frank exclaimed in a hurt voice.
"You'd better shut up Frank." Trapper warned. "Or you'll get worse than you already got."
"Like getting slapped with a sexual assault charge or something." B.J. added with an amused grin. He loved seeing Hawkeye finally nail the slimy weasel that they had both hated so much back in Korea.
Frank glanced at Hawkeye, who was hugging Margaret to him, taking deep breaths trying to calm his anger. Margaret was talking softly to him, her voice calm and soothing as she gently rubbed his back. "What's his problem anyway?" A trickle of blood dripped off Frank's lip. Wiping the blood with the back of his hand he added. "I don't see why he's getting so upset. This doesn't concern him."
"I think you'd be surprised how much this does concern him, Burns." Potter commented.
"Much more than you realize, Frank." B.J. added.
"Or ever dreamed." Trapper laughed softly.
"What is going on here?" Sidney asked B.J. quietly. He had been watching the little scene with great confusion and curiosity. "Why is Hawkeye being so protective of Margaret?"
"Because they're married." B.J. whispered softly, grinning broadly at the psychiatrist.
Sidney's eyes widened in surprise. "They are!" He exclaimed, looking at Trapper for confirmation. Trapper nodded. "Well, I'll be." He turned his attention back to the three people in the living room. After watching Frank for a minute, he leaned back towards B.J. and commented. "I take it that Frank doesn't know yet."
"That's right." B.J. smiled, greatly anticipating what will happen when Frank finds out that his old girlfriend was now happily married to his old enemy.
"This should be interesting." Sidney stated, looking back to the very confused Frank.
Hawkeye turned his head to look at Frank, his arms still around Margaret. Taking one final breath to try to keep his emotions in check, he exclaimed. "Have you no decency, Frank? How dare you hit on a married woman, a pregnant married woman even. You're disgusting."
"I never did that!" Frank exclaimed in horror. He had noticed that all the wives had gathered around the doorway to check out what was happening. He spotted Mrs. Burns grim face among them. Her eyes were full of anger. "I was merely getting reacquainted with an old friend. That's all. It wasn't what it looked like."
"Oh, come off it, Frank." Hawkeye's head dropped back as he rolled his eyes in disbelief. "I know exactly what you were doing, or trying to do. I'm not blind and I'm not stupid, and neither is anybody else. Especially your wife, if that's who you're trying to fool. We all know what you were trying to do. And let me promise you this, Burns. If I ever catch you with your hands on Margaret again, I'll cut your arms off at the elbows and beat you with them."
"There's no need for threats." Frank objected in a hurt tone. "I was only trying to be friendly."
"Frank, you don't get 'friendly' with other people's wives." Hawkeye stated. "You may take your marriage lightly, but trust me, I don't." Looking the other man square in the eye he continued. "So, don't you even think about getting 'friendly' with MY wife again."
The group that was standing in the doorway of the living room exchanged quick smiles as they waited eagerly for Frank's response. It took a few minutes for the dumfounded man to find his voice.
"YOUR wife?...your WIFE?" Frank finally managed to stutter in total shock. "You're married...to...to... Margaret, you're married...to...to...HIM!"
"That's right, Frank." Margaret smiled, hugging Hawkeye tightly. "For seven glorious years and two, make that three, wonderful children." She placed her hand on her rounded stomach and looked at her husband with a happy smile. Frank merely stared at her in disbelief.
"We told you Frank that this concerned him a lot more than you realized." B.J. quipped, laughing gaily.