"Okay you two." Potter countered, trying to head off the game of wits that was about to erupt. "Let's try to keep the conversation friendly. We don't need bruised egos and shattered pride to mar this wonderful day."
"Yes, Dad." Hawkeye remarked with a teasing glance at Charles before looking back to the picture of himself and Margaret still on the projection screen. He couldn't help but smile as he remembered how surprised she had been when he'd grabbed her and started kissing her. Though she probably wasn't as surprised as he was when she'd started kissing him back, wrapping her arms around his neck as she did so. Reaching over he squeezed his wife's hand again and then leaned over to kiss her on the cheek. "I love you." He softly whispered, looking into her eyes lovingly.
"I love you too." She returned, her expression also reflecting the love she had for him.
"If you guys like that picture so much, then you'll love this one." Klinger switched to a shot of Hawkeye and Margaret, sound asleep, cuddled together under one blanket.
"Klinger, where and how...?" Hawkeye exclaimed in absolute amazement. "Where was that taken?"
"I took it when you, Margaret and I had been sent up to that Aid Station to help out." Klinger replied. "I woke up the next morning and found you and Margaret snuggled together like this. I was so surprised that I decided to take a picture to make sure I wasn't dreaming."
"But where did you get the camera?" Trapper asked curiously. "That's not exactly standard equipment when you're on a mercy mission to the front."
"When I was packing my gear to go I noticed it in the bottom of my duffel bag. I didn't have time to worry about fishing it out, so I just threw my stuff in on top of it and left. I'm glad I did." He concluded, gesturing to the picture.
"I thought you said that nothing happened between you two on that trip." Trapper looked at his buddy accusingly. "Looks like you were holding out on me."
"Nothing did happen on that trip." Hawkeye assured him. "There was shell fire close by and Margaret was afraid. I was merely offering her a bit of comfort. All I did was put my blanket over her and sleep close, that was all."
Trapper shot his friend a disappointed look, but then brightened when he realized that these two people were now married, so even if something had happened then, something momentous had obviously happened at one time.
"Hey, who's that with Henry?" Hawkeye's voice interrupted Trapper's thoughts when Klinger changed the picture on the screen.
They all examined the picture closely for a moment before Margaret identified the person in question. "Isn't that General Steele?" She frowned for a minute then nodded. "Yes, I believe it's General Bradford Hamilton Steele. He was from the 8th Army, I think."
"Steele?" Hawkeye repeated, his expression one of puzzlement as he tried to remember the man.
"Surely you remember him, Hawk." Trapper laughed, immediately remembering the General. At his friend's expectant look he plastered a crazy expression on his face.
"Oh, yes!" Hawkeye exclaimed as he finally remembered who the man was. "'Loony' General Steele."
"The same." Trapper confirmed with a laugh.
"Boy, was he a few bricks short of a load." Hawkeye laughed, remembering some of the crazy things the General had said and done. "Remember how he wanted to make us bug out just because we were mobile." Looking at BJ he added. "He wanted to take us closer to the front!"
"Closer!" BJ exclaimed in horror. "What was he trying to do? Get you all killed?"
"I wouldn't be surprised." Hawkeye scoffed.
"Hawk, remember him trying to Court-martial you?" Trapper commented with a broad smile.
"Yeah, for impersonating a civilian." Hawkeye replied. "Too bad I couldn't have gotten busted for impersonating a Captain, maybe then I could have gotten sent home."
"'Fraid it's not that easy son." Potter chuckled in amusement.
"I know, I've tried." Klinger replied. "It also doesn't work if you impersonate a gypsy, a Korean woman, a little girl, a nurse or even Moses."
"Moses?!" Most of the group exclaimed in surprise.
"Moses!" Hawkeye and BJ both echoed with a hearty laugh.
"After that Captain was discharged because he thought he was Jesus Christ Klinger thought he'd pretend to be Moses." BJ explained giving the man a teasing smile.
"Fortunately Sydney had already left for Tokyo." Hawkeye added, looking at their psychiatrist friend, his eyes twinkling with laughter.
"I'm sorry I missed the show." Sydney remarked with a smile.
"Well, I told Klinger how to find you, Sydney." Hawkeye admitted. "I told him to take a left in the road and when he came to it to part the Sea of Japan, but he wouldn't listen to me."
"It's a good thing." Sydney chuckled softly. "If he had of succeeded I may have needed that Section Eight discharge." The group laughed at the remark.
Potter shook his head and commented. "I've got to hand it to you, Klinger. You sure went out of your way to go crazy."
"I did my best, sir." Klinger remarked slyly.
"Some people didn't have to try very hard." Trapper commented, gesturing back to the picture in front of them. "They were born crazy."
"You know, Colonel." Hawkeye looked at their beloved commanding officer, a mischievous smile on his face. "General Steele bears a striking resemblance to you."
"You know something, Colonel." Margaret agreed after carefully examining the photo again. "He's right. The resemblance is uncanny."
"Horse hockey!" The Colonel exclaimed, dismissing the thought. "I've met him, from Maryland, West Point grad. One brother's a US senator, another was the first volunteer to be bitten by a mosquito in the Panama Canal. He on the other hand is as loony as a jaybird. Doesn't look anything like me!" The group exchanged looks of disagreement, but said nothing as Potter ordered. "Next picture, Klinger."
"Yes, sir, almighty leader." Klinger replied as he changed the photo.
"Oh, ho!" Henry exclaimed as a picture form Klinger's first wedding appeared on the screen. Hawkeye, Trapper and BJ were almost rolling on the floor with laughter.
"Who on earth is that?" Peg exclaimed in surprise, noting how unbecoming the bride looked. "That bride has awfully hairy arms."
Klinger chuckled good-naturedly and replied. "The mysterious 'hairy bride' is none other than myself, Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger."
Peg's eyes widened in surprise as she glanced over to Klinger and Soon-Lee, who was seated at his side. Addressing Soon-Lee she said. "You actually married him while he was wearing that get-up?"
"That wasn't me." Soon-Lee replied with a broad smile. "When Max and I got married 'I' wore white dress."
At Peg's puzzled look Klinger explained. "That's a picture form my first wedding. I married my childhood sweetheart from Toledo via radio hookup, so she never saw what I was wearing."
"It's a good job, too, or she probably would have called off the wedding." Trapper remarked with a laugh. "After all, it isn't good if the groom looks better in a wedding dress than he bride."
"I still can't believe that you actually wandered around camp dressed like a woman." Peg remarked with a look of disbelief on her face. "Weren't you embarrassed when visitors stopped by?"
All Klinger's old comrades chuckled at the memory of all the different stunts that their friend pulled when visiting brass arrived.
"Nothing phased him." Potter replied with an amused glance at his old friend. "In fact he poured it on heavier when army brass came by. One time he pulled that wedding dress our and popped out of a waiting ambulance, throwing a bouquet at a visiting General."
Margaret chuckled and commented. "The look on Lyle Wisecroft's face was priceless. He didn't know what to think."
"Remember when MacArthur came by." Hawkeye added, looking at Trapper and Henry, a broad smile on his face.
"General Douglas MacArthur?" Potter questioned with surprise.
"The one and only." Trapper nodded with a sly smile.
"He came to the 4077th?" Potter asked, his eyebrows raising in surprise.
Henry nodded in confirmation and proudly replied. "He had heard of our high survival rate and wanted to visit our unit and meet the staff. Unfortunately, he only ended up driving by."
"Klinger was really the only one that got to greet him." Hawkeye added mischievously.
"Why? What did he do?" Potter asked curiously, glancing over at Klinger expectantly.
"He dressed up like the Statue of Liberty and stood just outside of camp." Hawkeye and Trapper both laughed at the memory.
"What did MacArthur do?" Potter asked in a tone of great anticipation.
"The only thing he could do." Hawkeye said in a serious and high-fluetent tone as he puffed out his chest slightly. "What any of us would have done..."
"He saluted." Trapper concluded, shooting his buddy a teasing glance, knowing he had taken the wind out of his friend's conclusion. Everyone burst out laughing at the exasperated look that Hawkeye gave Trapper. The thought of Klinger dressed as the Statue of Liberty and being saluted by General Douglas MacArthur, head of the United States army as contributed to the underlying mirth.
"I always knew the army was crazy!" Henry commented, shooting a sly look to Klinger as he added.