"Actually we met in Korea, well Tokyo actually." Radar replied. At everyone's surprised look he explained. "The last R&R trip that I took to Tokyo I met Patty at the airport. We started talking and laughing and then my plane was leaving. We made an agreement to look for each other when we got back home. She was from Lancaster, Missouri, which was only about 100 miles from here. After I got home from Korea I called the Lancaster operator and got Patty's phone number. I called her up, asked her out and the rest is history."
Hawkeye couldn't help but laugh at the casual way that Radar related the events. "The rest is history, eh?" He repeated with a sly smile.
"I guess all that advice that you gave him finally paid off, Hawk." BJ remarked with a teasing look at Radar.
"Advice?" Patty asked curiously as she looked at Radar expectantly. "What kind of advice?"
"Oh, nothing much." Radar replied evasively. "Just some man-to-man advice."
"Man-to-man advice." Hawkeye repeated in a teasing tone. "Uh, I seemed to remember it was more man-to-'little man' advice."
"Hawk!" Radar willingly reproved, his tone reproaching but his eyes twinkling.
"Come on, Radar." Patty pressed with an eager chuckle. "What kind of advice did Hawkeye give you?"
"Just some advice on women." Radar replied, his face flushing with mild embarrassment.
"Like what?" His wife continued to urge, an amused smile on her pretty face.
"Just things like what to do to impress someone I was impressed with, how to get her to notice me." Radar replied nonchalantly.
"Every time Radar met a nurse he liked he came running to Hawkeye to find out what he should do." BJ laughed, shooting the young man an amused look.
"Not true, Hunnicutt." Charles commented. "Once he came to me."
"Radar, I'm crushed." Hawkeye teased, looking at his old buddy with a mock hurt expression on his face. "You picked Charles over me. How could you?"
"Actually, Hawk." Radar replied. "I asked both of you for help that time."
"Oh, my advice wasn't good enough, eh?" Hawkeye feigned emotional injury. "What did Charles have to say that was so much better?"
"Actually that time I found my own approach that worked better." Radar confessed. "That is once I worked up the courage to use it."
"What was your approach?" Hawkeye asked curiously.
"I marched into her tent, told her I like her and asked her out." Radar replied.
"Ah, the direct approach, now why didn't I think of that?" Hawkeye joked.
"Probably because you have all the wit and charm of an overgrown gorilla." Charles needled, a sly expression on his face.
"Oh, you think so, eh!" Hawkeye exclaimed hautily. "I'll show you." Standing up he straightened his clothes before dropping down on one knee before Margaret. Taking her hands in his he said in a theatrical tone. "Margaret, I have been in love with you since the moment I first laid eyes on you. I know I'm only a silly doctor without a name to my senses, but I would give my left foot if you would promise to be mine and I would give my right if you would marry me. What do you say, Margaret. Will you promise to marry a silly, nameless, footless doctor who absolutely adores you?" He planted a loud kiss on the back of her hand and looked at her expectantly.
Margaret couldn't help but laugh heartily as Hawkeye peered up at her, his blue eyes wide with expectation. It was the same 'puppy dog' look that Rebecca had already perfected. With a broad smile she replied. "How could I turn down such a heart-wrenching appeal, besides I'm sure no one else would have you. And I always had a soft heart for pathetic creatures such as yourself." In response Hawkeye leaned up and planted a kiss on her lips. "Well, at least you're not a bad kisser." She remarked as he sat back down on his chair beside her and put his arm around her shoulders.
Looking back at Charles Hawkeye commented. "I may not be witty or charming enough for you Charles, but Margaret seems to appreciate my witty charm."
"Well, you know what they say, Pierce." Charles retorted. "War does strange things to people."
"Okay, enough you two." Potter countered, shaking his head at both men. "You are both determined to verbally abuse each other aren't you?"
"We're just getting into the spirit of the reunion, Colonel." Hawkeye replied. "Charles and I were always having a game of wits."
"If that's what you can call it with you as my opponent." Charles stuck in.
"And if I recall correctly." Potter remarked, giving both men a stern look. "A lot of times bruised egos was the result of such a match."
"Oh, well Charles' ego is big enough to sustain a bruising now and then." Hawkeye commented, shooting his opponent a sly glance.
"Actually, Hawkeye, if I remember correctly bruised egos weren't the only thing that would result from a game of wits between you two, or your three as the case may be." Klinger commented with a sly smile. "Sometimes it got more violent." With that said he changed the picture on the screen to reveal one of Hawkeye and BJ pinned against the wall in the Officer's Club as Charles sprayed them with beer from the bottle he'd shaken up.
"What did you two lunatics do to Charles to deserve that kind of revenge?" Potter asked with an amused laugh.
"We made him talk." BJ replied with a hearty laugh.
"I beg your pardon?" Their old CO asked, a puzzled look on his face.
"Remember when Charles lost out on the position as Chief of Thoracic Surgery at Massachusetts's General because he was in Korea?" BJ inquired. When Potter nodded his head in confirmation BJ continued. "Charles was so upset by the whole affair that he refused to speak to anyone in camp."
"I remember that!" Sydney exclaimed in a laughing tone. "Didn't he even divide his part of the 'Swamp' off from your you two with a blanket?"
"That's right!" BJ nodded with a large grin. "Well, Hawk and I couldn't pass up such a blatant challenge, so we tried different things to try to make him talk. Nothing work until we got Radar to give him a phony telegram from Massachusetts's General saying that they were appalled by the decision of the committee and would be more than happy to place his name on the list of candidates. After reading that telegram Charles eventually found his tongue."
"And after we got him to talk he made him yell!" Hawkeye added, gesturing towards the picture on the screen.
"You bet I yelled!" Charles exclaimed in annoyance. "It was the most slimy, rotten scheme that you two had ever pulled! And I still hate you for it!"
"Oh, come on, Charles." Hawkeye gave his old roommate a sad puppy look. "You don't mean that. We know that you worshipped the ground that we walked on."
Potter rolled his eyes at the two men and looked back to Klinger. "Let's keep this little trip down memory lane going, Klinger."
"Ey, ey sir." Klinger saluted and changed the photo on the screen.
"What on earth is that?" Mildred exclaimed in surprise when the next picture appeared on the screen.
"That, my dear Mrs. Potter is Margaret's brainstorm." Hawkeye commented with a chuckle. "It's a water fountain made out of bed pans."
"I don't mean to sound rude or abrupt but - why?" Mildred asked, her expression turning to one of amusement.
"It was a project that we had to do in order to get a larger water heater." Margaret explained with a broad smile. "HQ thought that our camp looked awful desolate and wanted us to try to beautify it a little bit. If we did that, then we would get the water heater that we so badly needed. So, with the help of Klinger and some of the enlisted men, we came up with this."
"I must say, it's...unique." Patty remarked with a chuckle. "How long did it last?"
"Until the next ambulance pulled into the compound." Margaret replied with a good-natured chuckle.
"Figures!" Trapper smirked with amusement. "It was a nice try. You definitely get an 'E' for effort."
"How about this monument?" Klinger asked as he flipped to a picture of Hawkeye and his tongue depressor tower.
"That must be the tower from that painting that you have." Daniel Pierce commented, looking at his son with a smile.
"That's the one!" Hawkeye nodded, then looking at Klinger asked. "But where did you get that picture? I didn't think that there was any taken of it!"
"Kelley had taken it." Klinger replied. "She thought it was an interesting 'thing-a-ma-bob'."
"I prefer to think of it as a big 'doo-hicky'." Hawkeye joked as he looked at the photo. Looking back to Klinger he asked. "Can I get of copy of that picture?"
Klinger looked at Radar slyly as he replied. "I'll see what I can do." Then looking back to Hawkeye he asked. "Do you want this one, too?"
Hawkeye laughed heartily at the shot of his monument exploding into a million pieces. Breathless he managed to gasp. "You should have seen the look on those reporter's faces when you blew that tower up! They just couldn't believe it!"
"I remember!" Klinger chuckled with amusement.
"What was the whole story behind this tower, Hawk?" Trapper asked curiously. "Why was it begin photographed by reporters?"
"Actually that was Klinger's doing." His friend replied as he shot their old company clerk a mischievous smile. "Klinger had gotten into the newspaper game as a little side business. Anyway, he's the one that told Stars and Stripes about the tower I was building. Stars and Stripes then sent a reporter and a photographer to cover it. But the 'reporter' turned out the be with Army Information, a little piece of information Klinger neglected to tell me."
"Hey, I didn't know he was from Army Information." Klinger defended. "I thought he was just a reporter like me."
"If he had been a reporter like you he would have never made it passed his first day." Charles remarked sarcastically, giving the other man a withering glance.
"Oh, yeah!" Klinger exclaimed in annoyance.
Charles clutched at his heart and exclaimed. "Once again I have been mortally wounded by Klinger's rapier like wit!"