By Rob Morris
Note: In my story, "Visions Of The Things To Be", I had four M*A*S*H* stalwarts aboard DS9-I even had Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce finally propose to Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan-at Vic's! But the crew of the 4077th decided to pull a practical joke. With Jake, Nog, and Alexander in tow, they recreated Jonathan S. Tuttle - a man who never existed. Like in the 1950's, people were swearing up and down that they knew the man. But apparently the Dominion was fooled as well, and it took Tuttle's 2nd death to turn their fleet back. Now, Worf committed a temporal no-no in the story-MAJOR! Plus, we can only imagine Captain Sisko's reaction to the Tuttle mess. Now, in this little follow-up, we need no longer imagine it. This story occurs at the same time as "Odo : The Endicott Syndrome" and is set right before Jadzia's death and related events.
Many weighty questions ran through Ben Sisko's mind. When to commence an assault on Cardassian territory. How to make sure their "allies" the Romulans didn't pull anything. How to capture Dukat.
But for now, he had only one question for Lieutenant Commander Worf.
"Worf, who the HELL is Jonathan Tuttle?! I've got Starfleet all over me, wanting to know what I'm going to do to avenge the loss of the Defiant's new commander! I just received a notice reinstating me as Defiant's Commander! I didn't even know that I'd been replaced! Everyone swears this man was the greatest hero of them all, but I've never heard of him. The Dominion has, though, apparently. Did you know that Captain Walter Macleod of the Glenfinnan was able to take out Keirdlea 2001? The Dominion was so transfixed on Tuttle, they left their prime maintenance yards wide open! Now, Bold Warrior, Give!"
Worf felt ill. He would never let this show, but he surely felt it. Sisko knew that Worf had lost control of his station to Pierce. But owing to Pierce's historical reputation as being uncontrollable, StarFleet chose not to press charges there. Still, Worf told of Tuttle.
"He--was one of Pierce's practical jokes, Captain. They utilized an unused personnel database that we now realize was a Dominion information drop-off point. That is how they came by the Tuttle Files. The man never existed, sir. But like wildfire, his reputation spread. Deanna Troi called me and asked me if I need grief therapy to deal with his loss. Jadzia declined on my behalf, prior to telling me about the message. I can see you have your hand over your face, Captain. I can only hope that my court-martial will...."
Worf stopped. Sisko wasn't grasping at his face. He was laughing.
"Ad-hehe-miral Jellico told - hhhphmmphg - me that Tuhhhhhuuutttle -HAHAAH - was his nepheeeeewwwww! The entire galaxy----Weyoun and Dumber--I-hhehe-mean Dammar - got all huffy demanding---BWAAHHAHA!"
"Captain, are you all right?"
Sisko regained his composure.
"Mr. Worf, consider all Tuttle material above top secret. Let the Dominion think they got us. As to the Temporal Prime Directive, I've assured Dulmur and Lucsly of Temporal Affairs - who are currently on retreat, after my report about Sherman Potter's bunch - that no timeline contamination occurred. You're just lucky Pierce and Houlihan went to that rally in 2003! Add a Priest who can freely traverse the timestream to the mix, and Temporal Affairs is in a frenzy."
A few matters still bothered Worf.
"Sir, why was Keiko switched with Mrs. Klinger? How did that serve the Prophets' purpose?"
"Near as we can determine, Doctor Taylor's early crude process of genetic augmentation would have left little Maxine Klinger sterile, down the road. No children for Maxine, no Keiko. No Keiko, probably no Miles O'Brien to save our hides on numerous occasions. Plus, the Pagh Wraiths had their eye on Potter-my ancestor. They were paying no attention to Soon-Lee Klinger, or to Father Mulcahy, who, if Kira is correct, is himself a Prophet in human form. Putting Keiko in pushed Taylor's hand. This scared General Steele, who hosted the Pagh Wraiths. They acted, and the Prophets cornered and destroyed them---in their frame of reference. In ours, the Pagh Wraiths still exist. Suffice it to say, Worf, the switch got things in motion."
"May I go now, Sir?"
"Two last things, Worf! Go to Quark's, there to congratulate Captain Walter Macleod on a job well done! Two, and most importantly - IF YOU EVER ALLOW A CATASTROPHE LIKE THIS AGAIN, I'LL TRANSFER YOU BACK TO THE ENTERPRISE - BY PERSONALLY LOADING YOU INTO A QUANTUM TORPEDO CASING! Dismissed."
As a shaken Worf left, he didn't see Constable Odo pass him on the way into Sisko's office. He also didn't hear Sisko continue to chuckle.
At Quark's, he saw Walter Macleod, Captain Of The USS Glenfinnan. The diminutive Iowan was one of Starfleet's best.
"Captain Macleod, I am Lieutenant Commander Worf. On behalf of Captain Sisko, I offer congratulations for the superb skill you performed your task with, in the destruction of the Dominion Maintenance Yards at Keirdlea 2001. You are to be commended, Captain!"
Macleod looked up.
"Geez, thanks, Mr. Worf. By the way, I have a message for you, too."
"Hawkeye and Margaret are living on New Deneba. If ya want to stop by, they'd love to see you. They were the ones as clued me in to when best to take out Keirdlea, on accounta the time paradox."
Stunned, Worf remembered what Jadzia had said about the Pierces' aging process--a day for each year. He decided to ask more.
"Er, Captain Macleod--"
"Call me Radar , Worf! All my friends do!"
Worf just stared.
"Its TRUE! Without the glasses....."